Body shaming says a lot about our culture.
You turn on the TV, you go on Social Media, you walk out on the streets, and somehow everything is already body shaming you.
We live in a world dominated by the audiovisual to a degree never seen in history, and there’s every reason to believe that the most narcissistic in human society are inducing a generalized psychosis affecting people of all races, all sexes, from all social status.
Our minds have never confronted such an exposure of people’s intimacy, including their bodies… in all kinds of postures, shapes, with all kinds of clothes, in all kinds of places – and often photoshopped.
We are more concerned about our bodies than ever, and also by other people’s perception of our bodies.
Body Shaming and Social Media
The first thing to know about body shaming is that it has experienced an incredible rise in recent years, especially in women.
This is a scientific fact recognized by psychological studies conducted by scientists such as Jonathan Haidt and Dr. Jean Twenge.
According to psychological research, the number of women (especially teenagers), who reported self-harming, depression, low self-esteem and confidence has quadrupled since 2010, the year Instagram was launched.
Is this a coincidence? Must surely not.
As Dr. Jean Twenge quite blatantly acknowledges:
‘It’s not an exaggeration to describe iGen as being on the brink of the worst mental-health crisis in decades.’
Here’s some of the most astonishing fact Dr. Twenge has found out in her research:
- The number of sexually active teens has decreased by almost 40 percent since 1991.
- Only about 56 percent of high-school seniors in 2015 went out on dates.
- In the late 1970s, 77 percent of high-school seniors worked for pay during the school year; by the mid-2010s, only 55 percent did.
What we see here is a tend that mostly affects the younger generations, linked to a reported oversensitivity caused by the overprotection prompted by the possibility of ‘socializing’ in isolation, i.e. from the protective cocoon of our rooms, through the safe window of our phone screens.
A lot of this is due to fear of body shaming, which can do much harm if we are not ready for it, and even lead to:
- Chronic low self-esteem
The good news is there’s ways to confront body shaming so it doesn’t complicate our lives. And we’re here to give you the best advice on how you can do this.
How to be Careless About Body Shaming
A comment can dig deep into our minds, even if we managed to flip things around and shame the shamer.
We can be susceptible to other people’s opinions, inadequately voiced out loud displaying a complete lack of civility, elegance and taste.
That doesn’t mean there’s no way to overcome body shaming, and live purer, better and more careless lives.
Here’s the best answers you can develop, both on an external an internal level.
Prepare Your Reply
Improvising is very difficult, but if you’re prepared, chances are things will turn out in your favor.
Ask yourself: what’s the best possible outcome against body shaming?
Maybe to make the aggressor feel that it’s not worth it. In order words: to make him/her stop.
How can you do this?
Apply the principle of no-reaction.
If you get this right, the aggressor will feel disappointed and will not seek to feed his sick and tiny ego by shaming you. In fact, he will be shamed by shaming you.
If they call you fat, simply reply: ‘Yeah, I bend time and space, in fact I have a whole gravitational thing going on around me.’
You get the idea, right?
By positioning yourself on your aggressor’s side, agreeing to his/her statements instead of reacting, you’re displaying the greatest confidence and carelessness.
If the struggle turns out in your favor, you will feel better about it, and you probably won’t hear of it no more. If it continues, reply:
‘You’re obsessed about me. Do you want an autograph?’
If he says yes, rejoice, then answer:
‘Sure, I’m going to give you two: one for being stupid, and the second one in case you lose the first.’
Here, the only limits are set by your imagination, so think about great answers and feel free to share them with us 😉
One way or another, don’t leave body shaming uncommented!
If you’re a victim of body shaming, chances are you need to work on your self-loving. This will be entirely beneficial for you.
The first steps to it are as simple as staring at yourself in the mirror and fully embracing who you are. Give yourself the love you give to everyone except yourself. You are worthy of appreciation.
Think about it.
You are a wonderful organism with magics and wonders operating at all levels, basically the result of millions of years of evolution.
Remember: Beauty standards are social constructs and vary through time and space. Learn to identify them and don’t let them condition you.
In other words: escape your own mind, learn to love your body, respect yourself more, and feel better in your life in general. Some of the best ways to do this include:
- Positive thinking
- Surround yourself with good people
Work on Your Appearance
Body shaming could even turn out to be very beneficial if you can turn it into a positive changing force.
Maybe there’s some aspects of your body than can be improved. But let’s get the framing right: this is not for other people, but for your own well-being.
You want to feel healthy, energized, confident and sexy. Let’s see how we can frame this properly:
- Workout: do not workout seeking to have a more ‘lean’ or ‘more attractive’ body. That’s a secondary and positive side-effect. Workout to feel good. Exercising releases endorphins which make you feel energized, confident and happy. That’s the point.
- Diet: something similar applies to dieting. You should think of food as a tool. If you have the right diet, your body will thank you for it, you will feel balanced, energized and healthy, which will positively impact all other aspects of your life. Do not punish yourself with food. Allow yourself to enjoy a nice meal, and just cut on carbs, fats and consume more calories than you take in.
- Surgery: due to genetics and metabolism, certain people will have a very difficult time getting into a healthy body shape. In such case, aesthetic surgery can be envisioned, but only if all previous methods have been unsuccessfully tested. You might want to consider the following to deal with body shaming:
- Weight loss surgery: a series of procedures can lead to decreased appetite with gastric balloons or by reducing the size of your stomach. This can lead to a 40KG weight loss in 1 year.
- Liposuction: liposuction is a fat removal procedure, so it is not a weight loss surgery! It’s results are best when patients find themselves already in good physical shape and wish to sculpt their body to enhance their silhouette.
- BBL: another fat removal procedure, with a little bonus: a portion of the extracted fat is injected into the buttocks, which can shape a very pleasant figure.